WELCOME
If you are on this page – you are either a new team member, or really interested in how we roll – We are delighted you will be working with us in some capacity, or, want to see who we are for real day to day.
Following in no specific order, are ideas on how we all seem to not just co-exist, but flourish
Our Day to Day Tech
Slack – for team messaging – no IM client creep please!
Asana – for project management – Drucker said, “That which is measured, is managed.” This is what we use for everything!
GSuite formerly Google Apps – its good enough. ‘nuff said.
Dropbox – for projects where filesharing in bulk format is far easier than GDrive.
8×8 VoIP – well, umm, none of us can differentiate between the different folks in this space. If you have brilliance in VoIP vendors, please share!
Evernote – we love Evernote, many of us use it to capture everything. That said, it is unofficial, and not supported by us – just well acquainted.
UberConference – again, its rather hard to differentiate in this space, but they have worked well even in free mode for us.
MightyText – if you don’t have it, or a similar app, why the heck not? Not supported, but they rock.
ScheduleOnce/Calendly – we use them both individually and love it. If you are working biz dev , this is required. Some of us (yeah, geeks) occasionally use it for social purposes as well.
Our “Corporate” Environment
Heres the deal, in about as straight way of speaking as possible.
We are a small firm, with finite resources.
On the good side, that makes us nimble and scrappy. On the bad side, that makes us risk averse.
As such, the rule like in Bill and Ted or some other crappy 80s movie that was so bad, it rocked, is, “Be good to each other.” In the bad old days, Google kind of went that way – and look where it got them.
Seriously though, we have not had a problem – but we do have a way of dealing with it – so you are for-warned. If a complaint is lodged, there isn’t an investigation – there is just a summary dismissal, or cancelation of project for cause. We aren’t going to fight, we can’t afford huge legal bills – the law says we can let anyone go for any reason at any time (well, barring normal discrimination etc.) and we will do just that. If you upset a coworker enough that they come to management, and we assure you ALL we encourage just that, you are gone. Immediately.
We had to include the above paragraph. Don’t be stupid, be in love with who you are working.
Our workplace is NOT profanity friendly. That said, there is a “swear jar” costing $1 everytime. Since some of us are potty mouths attempting to reform – call us out on it!
We are NOT a cat friendly environment, due to allergies. We are dog friendly – but there is a whole procedure for reservations. Talk to someone before bringing in Fido – we want it to be awesome for everyone involved.
We welcome virtual teammates, and particularly try to chat with them on video once a day!!!
We are a child and nursing friendly environment (barring screaming hissy fits – if the monster has come out, we will all bribe your child with candy to shut up, even if that means you have to deal with their withdrawal.) For you men uncomfortable with nursing moms, you aren’t men. Grow up. Fuck you. 1$ in the tip jar – and it was worth it.
We don’t care what you do in the privacy of your home, but if you are working with us, we expect your best work is done sober. Except for you all-creative types, you guys just keep on doin’ what it is you doin’ with whatever you choose to do. Right on.
If you have wet/muddy/snowy shoes/boots – kick ‘em off at the door, just like mom told you.
Be good to each other.
If you are caught stealing items from the refrigerator, violence is a perfectly acceptable response. Proportional. But violent.
Life is to short for crap coffee – here in the office, and at home. Tell us if you need remedial coffee education and sourcing.
Crap does not count for the swearing jar.
We are NOT a goat friendly office. Thanks for asking. However, if your goat is potty trained, considering they are normally hypoallergenic, go ahead, bring in your trained goat.
As you can tell, some of this document is generated in response to queries from the cheap seats. Go ahead, train your goat smartass. We named ourselves after the damn animals (that’s 50 cents) and know that even “well trained” goats are unruly beasts with their own minds. Prove us wrong. Anyhow, the point is that this document is organic and evolving.
If you have questions – drop us a line.
If you have ideas – drop us a line!
HeavyGoatHumanTeam HR@heavygoatindustries.com